By Dr. Gail Cloud
I had an experience recently where someone called me and told me about the sticky situation they had gotten themselves into which reminded me of something that happened with my father and how it affected me years before.
In the past, when something like this happened, I would get very upset and anxious and then I would compartmentalize the situation. If anyone asked me how I was, I would tell them I was ok.
This time I started like before where I became anxious and upset.
What I did next was different in an important way. Instead of compartmentalizing my feelings and putting them somewhere inside of me and in my body, to come out at a later time out of my control, I let myself feel my feelings. I let myself cry and feel scared. I felt sad for that person, for myself being in the position of having to help them, and I felt sad for my father and for me in being in this position for over 4 years with him during the time I cared for him after my mother died and he developed severe dementia.
I felt sad. I felt scared, I felt helpless, and for a few minutes I felt like I had to go out and save them. I even let myself feel guilty because I didn’t do that.
Then, I let go of the guilt. That is their issue and situation. I was able to give guidance, and then to let it go. I accepted that I was helpless in changing them or helping them other than giving advice.
I am not their savior. Dad was not my savior although he tried to be until he couldn’t.
And I began to feel relief. I could take a deep breath. And as I write this, I find I am taking deep relieving breaths. Just writing this helps me to release more of the need to be a savior. What a burden I have carried for years.
What are you releasing? What burden or burdens are you carrying?
Can you do or respond differently than you have in the past? And do you find yourself in the role of stepping in and having to save someone?
If you would like help with this process, and seeing your patterns, call me or email me to set up an appointment; www.bodypresencing.com.,
Gail@bodypresencing.com., 314-995-9755.
I enjoy being a guide to you being your own agent of health
Gail Cloud, D.C.
Healing the Root of the Matter
BodyPresencing; be-ing through presence