By Jean Ponzi
In this third 1/3 of my life, I’ve set myself the project to study and share whatever I can learn about the Nature of Change. For a Green-service focused, eco-logically analytical elder girl in the species Homo sapiens, this feels like a useful effort from my time remaining on our sweet Earth.
I’m pursuing my study, currently, through DIY overhaul of our Kitchen. It’s the heart of a home so, overall, no small feat, especially for Septuagenarian Contractors: husband Dale assisted by me. More on this later.
First, what the heck is Structure?
How parts are held or put together to form a function-fulfilling whole – and all relations between and among all the parts and functions. It’s all the stuff and what connects it.
Structure thrives in Biology, Music, Chemistry, Architecture, Geology, Ecological Communities, Mathematics, Dance, Engineering, Poetry… You name it.
Structure is what holds up our homes, which takes me to what I learned over months of my kitchen’s Structural Change.
Friends said, “Oh great – you’re re-doing your kitchen! What kind of countertop did you choose?” Like a surface is the most crucial thing? The most FAQ, which pretty much everyone asks, in every interaction, has been “Is it DONE?”
I’ve learned how Change is a constant flow and Change occurs in moments. There’ve been multiple points of DONE, as multiple streams of work flowed along. We’re close to saying the D-Word for the project overall, but DONE was never the point for me, attending to the process.
A big hunk of Structure we had to Change was getting the kitchen floor Level. Partly to restore this 1880-era home’s structural integrity, also because our real (non-off-gassing) Linoleum new floating floor panels have to be laid on a level surface, or they’ll pop apart.
Getting to Level involved taking up the original floor and sistering a series of planks onto the floor joists below, one at a time, methodically, from one side of the room to the other. Then we laid down sheets of plywood as a new sub-floor, meticulously screwed to the joists to prevent floor squeaking.
From rip-up to lay-down? Six months. Our place was the House of (w)Holes.
As Helper and Housewife, I’m committed to this project. Happily, I tolerate Chaos well.
I enjoyed living with these changes in Structure. I appreciated the sections of plywood we’d temp-screw down every night, securing walk boards over the holes to reach the still-working old sink and cooktop.
I got to live with the guts of my home. Not only the joists, but the plumbing, the wiring, the sills and studs and all their spaces. I could see and appreciate what they all do, in the unseen ways they support Kitchen Function.
This felt like appreciating Nature, where so many structures and relations dance together to support quality of life for all.
This long story is short, to make the point that Structural Change doesn’t have to be a trauma. Especially when you voluntarily up-end your day-to-day to make some Change to improve life-for-all going forward.
I let go of my Kitchen Power and Control, while continuing to live and work right there. I sent myself through changes and came out fine.
Change happens – including Structural Change. Biologically, musically etc. – and in organized human society. Holding onto “power” throws whole systems into chaos as they go through the kind of periodic discombobulation that’s normal in Earth life overall.
When a person can modulate her response, she can focus toward both flows and moments of much-desired Change, without being bent out of shape all the time.
She can Change her most profound Response Structure.
And after maybe a few modest months, she can walk through her place with real Appreciation, not Fear-and-Loathing, for life’s (w)Holes.
Jean Ponzi is a longtime, strong STL area voice for Earth, through her work for the EarthWays Center of Missouri Botanical Garden and her enviro-interview show Earthworms, a feature of formerly vibrant KDHX St. Louis Community Radio.