A Word To The Wise: You Make Me So Angry!

With Kate Schroeder, M.Ed, LPC, NCC

If only it were that easy. If only we could blame all of our problems and our unhappiness on others- it sure would make our lives easier, wouldn’t it? We could then walk around, focusing our time and energy on other more important things, like how to figure out more clearly what exactly IS wrong with our spouse or partner, our children or our boss. Then, and only then, would we be able to finally get rid of our problems, right? Change the other person, and then we will for sure end up happy. That’s the name of the game.

Most people spend an inordinate amount of time focusing on eliminating the problems outside of ourselves, and not enough time looking deep inside to the source of our perception about “the problem” in the first place. No problem really exists outside of yourself; rather it is all based upon your perception of what is happening around you. Everything that occurs in the world around you is neutral, and reflects more about the other person involved in the situation than it does about you. However, your perception of what is occurring is solely responsible for how you are going to feel about said situation. And if your perception is faulty and outdated, based upon old unfinished business and programs installed in childhood, then you can most certainly ensure that your reaction is going to be
largely out of proportion to the actual event that is taking place present day.

Typically, whenever something occurs in life (a comment or response to you, a look, a choice or action that has taken place, an ending or a failure) that you cannot let go of, you can be rest assured that that is not about the here and now event fully, but largely about your childhood and unresolved issues that exist deep inside. That is true whether you are dealing with a cranky child, a lousy boss, a critical spouse, an angry driver on the road, or even just a pet that won’t listen to what you would like for them to do. Do yourself and them a favor: get some help, stop and begin to take a look inside yourself; this is a warning sign to you that something is off balance and it is time to look more closely at what is happening inside yourself. In this way, you can move towards deeper and more fulfilling relationships in your life.

For more information on therapy services, guided imageries, meditations, classes, and upcoming programs visit Kate at:

Transformation Counseling, LLC
8084 Watson Road, Suite 226
Saint Louis, MO 63119
(314) 761-5310