A Word To The Wise

With Kate Schroeder, M.Ed, LPC, NCC

The Earth As Our Spirit Guide

If you have ever spent time by the ocean, you’ve experienced the healing beauty of the earth in the water, sand, sunshine, wind and critters that take up residence by the sea. There is a profound sense of solidity that comes from knowing that the ocean was here long before us, and will continue to ebb and flow long after we are gone. We are not responsible for its functioning, in fact, the ocean would do much better if we stayed out of its way and allowed it to do what it knows best how to do. Each day, the ocean’s different personalities come through naturally and on its own accord; some days the water is rough, some days calm, other days the waves carry in lots of sea life, and some days there is nothing in the water. But every day it is the ocean, a great and healing friend.

Being a relational species, as humans, we cannot avoid our need for connection to others. Relationships are necessary in order for us to survive, as necessary as the moon is for the ocean tides. Many relationships spend an inordinate amount of time alternating back and forth between feeling love for and by another, and being afraid to love or not be loved.

Interestingly, when we trace emotions back to their most basic sense, we often see that fear and love are the elemental counterpoint of emotions. They are primary concerns, and many of the struggles in a person’s life and relationships can be traced back to inappropriate amounts of one or both at times in their life.

Relationships are much like the ocean waves; they are constantly flowing experiences, changing with every moment as living, breathing entities. A healthy relationship flows back and forth between independence and interdependence, allowing two whole beings to come together into something greater. Leaning too heavily on independence or interdependence is naturally going to tilt the relationship off balance, and lead to many problems in the relationship. And this is often where the challenge in relationships comes in: how much of each is too much? No one can answer this question for themselves as long as they are out of touch with their true self and their true wants and desires. And this is commonly the case before deep self-exploration and healing: it is impossible to know what you truly want as long as you are still living out of your wounded, defended self.

The only motivation of our defensive structure is “no more pain”, and this part of you will do whatever it takes to survive emotionally, not bothering itself with the necessary matters of being truly alive.

To find these answers, you must be willing to get involved with yourself. Only by daring to peer into the depths of your soul, step out into the rough waters of your past can you ever hope to find your own natural emotional rhythm in life. And this is the best investment you will ever dare to make.

For more information on therapy services, guided imageries, meditations, classes, and upcoming programs:

You can contact Kate at
Transformation Counseling, LLC
8084 Watson Road, Suite 226
Saint Louis, MO 63119
(314) 761-5310